I am having a really hard day today. I feel heartbroken and helpless. I haven't ovulated this month, or at least if I have it was super early or will be super late. I have tested every day for almost two weeks and they have all been negative. After having so much hope last month and with starting another cycle this month....and then this...I hate this, I hate it. I am desperate for help, desperate for hope, desperate for something to make me feel like this won't continue to be such a hard battle. I am so sick of struggling that I'm about to just give up. I try SO hard to give this up to GOD and just let Him have it...but it's hard. I keep wondering what I can do,what I have to do to make this happen. I am begging for a sign, a sign to either give up or keep trying...I just don't know what to do. My heart has shattered today. After trying to hold it together and have faith and hope for so long, I can't do it anymore. I don't feel like I have anybody to talk to about this. My family doesn't understand, many of my friends don't understand and I don't want to bother those that do. My husband, amazing as he is, doesn't get it...he just keeps saying "We'll just have to keep trying", but yet he refuses to "try"...I know he feels used sometimes, but this is something that we both want and if he's not willing to try his damndest with me...I don't know what...it's just extremely frustrating. I guess I just have to keep praying...begging for some kind of sign, or for somthing to happen.
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In Strength, Love & Faith. Thanks for reading ~ Charity
Honey, you will never "bug" me! I'm always here for you! Ya never know, remember I ovulated after FOUR months, it only takes the one time! I know it's beyond frustrating, especially when those around you don't get it. Keep praying, God always answers but sometimes he speaks softly.
ReplyDeleteI love ya and can't wait to see you!